They don’t tell you that you’re going to go from having to pee 2-3 times a night to every 60-90 minutes.
They don’t tell you that getting out of bed will require you to use the nightstand for leverage.
They don’t tell you that kneeling for an hour to put together furniture for an hour will result in a day of sore knees and glutes.
They don’t tell you that you will be constantly ravenous but your stomach won’t be able to hold much food.
They don’t tell you that the insomnia will hit again, causing you to wake 60-90 minutes before your alarm so you can just stare at it until it’s time to get up.
They don’t tell you that you’ll finally hit the pregnant lady waddle or how enormous you’ll look.
I am beginning to understand why some women are like ‘GET IT OUT’ around this time. I’m not that uncomfortable and I would still like her to keep cooking (if for no other reason than my favorite midwives are on call the weekend she’s due), but… I’m starting to get it.
When your feet swell daily, so you want to elevate, but need to keep your feet even with your hips so the baby isn’t sunny side up. Clearly, the answer is to steal the office stepstool and heaven help those who object.
For some reason, I thought I would get through this pregnancy without my feet swelling. Because I am the best pregnant person ever and therefore immune from such things? I don’t know.
But the clock ticked over to 32 weeks on Wednesday, and, right on cue, my feet have started swelling. New priority: elevating as much as possible.